While any structure built in a way that lessens its footprint is welcomed, some of the buildings that people try to turn green simply make no sense.
LEED certification, in all its greatness, does not take the building’s intended purpose into account; this leaves us with some hilarious, unabashedly self-contradicting buildings. Here are the ten of the most laughable green buildings:
1. BP’s Helios House Gas Station – Los Angeles, Cal.
Yes, there is an LEED-certified gas station. It’s actually a nice building, complete with rainwater collection, solar panels, recycled building materials, and LED lighting. However, don’t think you’ll be able to refuel with biodiesel or charge up your electric car—they’re only in the petroleum-dealing business. How green of them, right?
2. Justin Timberlake’s Golf Course/Lodge – Woodstock, Tenn.
So Justin Timberlake decided that he wants to buy a golf course and fix it up with an LEED-certified lodge. While it’s an improvement compared to most other golf courses, the fact remains that maintaining a golf course takes chemicals and lots of water. In the United States alone, golf courses total more than 1.7 million acres and consume around 4 billion gallons of water every day. How does a green lodge counteract the water used to maintain the course? Justin, if you really want to be green, you should have turned it into a wildlife sanctuary instead.
3. Nestle Pure Life Water Bottling Plant – Boiling Springs, Tenn.
While this isn’t the only LEED-certified water bottling plant, it’s listed for having the most greenwashed name. Ozarka, Arrowhead, Ice Mountain, and Deer Park water bottling plants also have LEED certifications of some sort, but they couldn’t compete with Pure Life in the name department. If anyone needs a reminder of why bottling water is a bad idea, here are five reasons to ditch the bottle. Oh, and Nestle as a whole won’t be getting an award for their treatment of the planet and its people any time soon.
4. Logan Airport Terminal A – Boston, Mass.
Activists in England have put their freedom on the line protesting against a third runway at the enormous Heathrow Airport; do you think they’d be more satisfied with the runway if the airport terminal was LEED certified, with solar panels and the whole bit? You’d be right to assume they wouldn’t, because whether they take off from a green building or not, airplanes are still one of the top causes of global warming.
5. Toyota Car Dealership – Rockwall, Tex.
While Toyota is almost synonymous with green when it comes to cars, in reality they’re not much better than any other car company. They have a full line of vehicles, including four-wheel-drive SUV’s, some of which are 8-cylinder. In fact, their entire fleet’s average gas mileage is worse than Chevrolet’s. Perhaps they should clean up their cars before trying to green their dealerships?
6. Antilia Tower – Mumbai, India
While this probably will not be LEED certified, it has been often mentioned as being one of the greenest building concepts on the planet. While it does look beautiful and will act as a giant carbon sink in the middle of the city, there’s a major problem: it will be the home of one family. No matter how green this building is, that is a complete waste of space in a city known for its overcrowding.
7. Civic Center Parking Garage – Santa Monica, Cal.
The only green parking garage I want to see would be located at a train or bus station for people to drop off their cars to finish their commute on mass transit. To quote every politician involved in the 2008 campaign, “You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.”
8. Vacation Home Development – Las Vegas, Nev.
You only need one house, people! Granted that seven of these eight homes are 1/12 shares, these homes are being built in a desert (Las Vegas) and if anyone needs a water-capture system, it’s people who live there year-around. Simply due to their excess, vacation homes may be the least environmentally-friendly structures on earth.
9. Spaceport America - New Mexico
Another case of the rich attempting to make the rest of us think they’re doing the world a favor. Recreational space travel, at least with the current technology, is a huge and unnecessary carbon polluter. But hey, the spaceport will be LEED certified, so everything’s going to be fine, right?
10. Every Fancy New Building – Dubai, United Arab Emirates
I know, I know — I cheated on this one. I couldn’t pick just one since they’re all ridiculous for the same reason. The government is intent on making Dubai one of the biggest, most gaudy places on earth. Perhaps to compensate for unending excess, they’ve mandated that all new buildings must have specific eco-minded properties, but when you take all of it in at once, you know it’s nothing but a giant waste of resources.
Image Credits: (All Flickr under CC License) Top from J. Phil on Flickr. 1. danperry.com on Flickr 2. BP 3. Macon County, TN 4. MileageNYC on Flickr 5. Dushaun on Flickr 6. Concept illustration 7. City of Santa Monica 8. Emre Ersahin 9. Spaceport America 10. utpal. on Flickr




















Good job with this. Any building that is not in an urban area is inherently inefficient with energy and space. The problems of transporting people across unnecessary distances for basic activities and fragmentation of natural land cannot be solved with technology.
Love it! Particularly like the selection of the golf course. I tend to agree with Mark Twains description: “a good walk spoiled” . Great awards. Presume their will be no award ceremony?
Any new building is a drag on the environment so “green” architecture is generally green washing. I do feel that LEED and architects have co-opted the green movement. But in a time of continued economic and population growth the only hope I have is that as older buildings are retired and replaced, the new generation of buildings will all be zero net energy or low impact.
I disagree with the author.. imagine some conventional buildings of the same functions in the same site of the existing green buildings.. their carbon footprint will be higher than a green building..
Perhaps the author could go a bit greener himself and quit breathing. His exhaled breath is just so much CO2! I’m sorry, I set the the bar very high…if we’d all just go back to living in caves and eat berries and nuts the earth may then be OK!
You obviously don’t play golf.
Then there are the folks that will bitch if you feed them with a green spoon.
lol.. dude..THEY ARE ATLEAST DOIN THEIR BIT. wat th hel u doin?!
as an architect, I feel that your criticism is misplaced. LEED certification is really, really expensive. the fact that these developers decided to spend money for it is commendable in itself. if you’d like to provide a meaningful criticism, put together a “10 least sustainable building functions” list, or “10 least sustainable recreational activities” list. but to criticize these projects for throwing down hundreds of thousands of dollars to achieve a sustainable rating, despite their less than sustainable programs is fairly sophomoric. criticize the market and cultural forces that created these projects, not the projects themselves.
more… you say Dumbest but i think it’s great… lol…
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ur all dumb hippies